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What Do You Want From Life?

I've had something of an epiphany. Its' so dorky, I hesitate to use the E-word on it. For me, I woke up with my mind on my work, specifically the concept of audience.

I realized I don't have one. I do not have a vision of an audience to guide my work. These days, I have as much work as I ever did in the computer field, I just don't make any revenue off it. And the reason I don't make money off of it is I don't have a target. I don't have to make money on my work, and absent the driver, I've never given serious consideration to an audience.

Listen, I've said for years, ever since I set off down the path to be a writer, I don't do it for any other reason than it's fun. It's a boatload of work, don't kid yourself, and that's just the composition side, I'm not even talking about the business side. It's been a luxury I can afford, and so I write for myself.


When I woke up this morning, I had the realization is I don't count as an audience. Even if you throw in my alters. I could see clearly that my approach was selfish—more than once, a friend has said to me words to the effect that I don't know who might benefit from reading my stuff, so in a way I'm depriving an audience I never even considered having.

One thing for sure—any worries about whether my shit is any good are moot, given my audienceless approach. Right? Is my writing-for-myself just a cop out 'cause I'm scared of rejection?

The answer to that last questions is phuck no.

At least, I'm not scared of rejection any more. I'm sixty-two years old, I'm not scared of much anymore.

I imagine one reason I've empowered my audiencelessness is because I'm lazy. I can create a manuscript, work on revisions, and not feel like it's 'done'. I never knew why I felt like that, but it seems pretty clear at this point—I got no phucking audience!

So, that changes, starting right now.

I'm not planning on losing my mind over the concept or the building of an audience. In fact, just looking at my own material, it's clear that I will not be able to operate with a single audience.

Whoa. It just hit me. I actually have considered audience before. I just wasn't very structured about it.

See, I currently have two writing identities: those I create under my own name (the 'serious' stuff) and those I create under a pen name (the crazy stuff). The only reason I can think of for doing that is because I am guessing on the appeal to two different audiences. I'll be damned. I have rudimentary belief sub-system around audiences.


Alright, I'm not going to start this unblog all over again. The point is basically the same—I need to think about audience! I mean, the stimulus for this concern was an article I read about blogging that avows "Staying focused", arguing that a blog must be 'about something' if it's to have any success. And that this staying focused requirement means you are adequately dialed in on what your audience wants to here.

Lordy. My and my epiphanies.

The fact is…and I think will remain to be…I'm gonna write my stuff, and henceforth, there will be some thought around a target audience. Not a lot! Like I say—I'm sixty-two, I just want to get the shit out before I croak!

But.

I promise, henceforth I will think about YOU, my audience, with the hope that, indeed, some of my words, whether I ever know it or not, will lift somebody up, make their life better, even if only for a very short time and in a very small way. Small counts! With small, you look to the 'cumulative' benefit.

This should be interesting. Please leave comments or send me email if you want to identify yourself as a target. Audience, that is.

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